It's not just about secrets. It's about allowing someone to see you at your very worst. It's nice to see someone at their best. But you really get to know a person when they are at their worst. I learned something about myself with trust. I haven't been trusting my own voice. Who knew? I would trust others. But I didn't trust myself. Once that negativity was removed...I saw things clearly. I'm still dealing with residual negativity. When I remove negativity it doesn't just go away like a snap of fingers. Rather, it's a gradual removal. I become emotionally attached to people and beings. Today, I had an opportunity to gain trust from two wild cats. They tolerated each other enough to let me close enough (but still a safe distance) to feed them. We trusted each other. It felt good. It reminded me of trusting someone with who I am at all moments. I am so grateful to those who let me be free. I forgot how free I could be. Me getting older is teaching me to let go. 38 has given me a new resolve. It's not a screw you kind of resolve. But it is one where if you don't like me for who I am in front of you...if you feel the need or want to change a part of me to suit you...well...that says something more about your shortcomings than mine. And you're not worth my time. You can have surface time. I don't like running away from people. But you won't get me. Likewise, if I am not a benefit to your life...please do something. I want to be a positive impact on you. I want to leave you with feeling good about yourself because I helped with that. If nothing else, I want to make you laugh or smile...or both.
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