The blogness of our life: Drinking the Kool Aid

Yup. I did it. I drank the Kool Aid. I didn't just dork dip. I swam in the deep end. All by myself. My friend "L" has been wanting to take Jeremy and I to a comic con. So what better way then to experience it but on a small scale. Crossroads. Yes. I call that mall Crossroads still has some great events to bring back business to that mall. I went as Ruri Gokou. An anime character that liked to cosplay. Anime inception!!! But I ended up buying a wig and it changed things. Honestly, I didn't think I looked like anyone particular but I was asked to get my picture taken, twice. I kinda felt like a celebrity of sorts lol. "Twinsie" ended up telling me I looked like Jovia Luxar. It was an amazing experience. And then, an unbucket list of sorts. That really, I didn't know was in me. I used to watch an Anime called Naruto. I loved that show. I managed to find some people..some who knew each other. Others, I sort of just asked to be in a photo op with each other. I totally had a fan girl moment. "L" was just happy to witness my insane moment. It was surreal. My inner nerd actually came out, naturally. The day wasn't over with. I ended up going home and hanging with her...gaming. So...Jess. The gamer girl. I told Jeremy about my day and discovered he has never cosplayed. So I told him a want and need is cosplaying with him. Eventually I want to game with him. But I am a console girl and he's more PC. We have to figure that out. Besides, he's studying for the second part of his test. I don't want to mess up his groove with that. We are getting back on track. We're playful with each other. Even with the ugly stuff between. And it felt great for him to admit his part in my hurt. I appreciated that. I gotta open this mouth when I am at my limit or have issues with things. Healthy boundaries and all that shit. I get so...mousy. I want to make people so happy, I forget about my own feelings and needs. Bad Jess. I'm giving platelets tomorrow. I finally have the strength for that. Just a lot going on. But time for resting too. "L" gave me some awesome socks, btw. I've already worn them. I sort of had the Hufflepuff colors going on yesterday. I looked super adorkable. So enjoy the pictures. See that smile come back. I am trying to get out of my comfort zone. I am trying to figure my voice. My confidence will come back in a different way. Gotta try and try and try. How does one kick oneself in the ovaries? It's what I am trying to do. lol No. That is not a discrediting laugh. That is a sincere laugh of figuring all this out. By Drinking the Kool aid!!!

Ooh something shiny!!!