Gift of quality time

This was the weekend of that.  It actually started Thursday with walks with one of my best friends.  I do love our walks now.  I look around me and see the beauty and majesty of my surroundings.  I become giddy when we cross paths with animals. I feel at peace when I do this.  Life has a funny way of becoming stressful.  I am thankful I am finding ways to have an outlet or manage my stress.  However, I will say since October 1 a good bit of my anxiety has subsided.  It hasn't completely gone away.  And I do have little demon voices here and there that like to pop up.  But it's nothing like it used to be.  My new normal includes serenity now.  And that's such an amazing feeling.  And it's the people in it that help to ground me.  Jeremy and my tribe help me every day see the brilliance that this world brings.  And the brilliance I can give back to it.  Then, I spent quality time with two of my other best friends.  As a couple, they are amazing.  As individuals, they are amazing.  As a trio, we are unstoppable. With Jeremy, Look out world!!!! Waiting for you by Jim Brickman is on.  I'm starting to include this as part of the blog.  It seems fitting to imagine the sounds I hear as I am writing.  Back to the blog.  There was much discussion about the Rosary I attended. I have since dealt much with the pain of Javier.  There will always be things I have to work on but I am in a better place with things about him.  He's kind of a loser now in my eyes.  Harping or giving him much thought seems like a waste of time.  As rude as this sounds...he's a waste of space.  I know he went through his own pain.  But, My God....man the fuck up and don't be such an asshole.  He still has monster qualities but it's more looking at such a narcissist that can't or won't see the torture and pain he inflicts on others.  Moving on...I digress. Squirrel! Friday was a beautiful time for reflection and just enjoying the moment.  Music is a big deal between us.  And then Saturday.  One of my best friends took me to the one play I have been dreaming of going to since I was kid.  I'm just too shy to say...Hey...take me to this play..I want to go! Old habits of trying not to be a burden come up.  So JB took it upon himself to take me.    Thank you.  I bought a new poem book on one of the places of our adventures.  We're like crazy little travelers on our adventures.  Sometimes I imagine we're characters from a book.  And then, Sunday.  Quality time with Jeremy just being still.  We snuggled for an hour and a half.  I had my music on, playing my Butterfly playlist...as usual.  But Sunday was different.  We smiled more.  We sighed happily more.  And then the intertwine of us loving made everything just, magical.  I cried afterwards from being so happy.  I cry alot now from being happy.  I don't care anymore.  I'm happy beyond belief.  Beyond my wildest dreams.  I had to have someone pinch me to make sure it wasn't a dream.  I'm having wishes come true that I didn't even know I asked for it.  It's like a new unbucket list of sorts.  And it comes with me sighing, in utter amazement at the gift of quality time. With beautiful people.  I miss one of them but her career doesn't afford her much time.  We talk every day though.  And she is no less my best friend than the others.  So there it is.  The gift of quality time.  It was my 3rd love language.  Oh. I almost forgot to tell you.  I received a gift that sent me in chills from happiness.  It's a beautiful bag with the trinity knot on it.  I feel so connected to that symbol. I always have.  I cherish that gift like I cherish the best friend who gave it to me.  I hope you have people in your life like I do.  This come from many years with toxic people.  This wasn't overnight.  But I realized I had to change who was around me for me health.  And my well being includes mental, emotional, and spiritual support from people who truly love me....for me.  And accept me...for me.  That is worth all it's weight in white gold.